Hospital Visit

37 Weeks, 1 day

Last night was hard. Hard for me, my body, and the baby. Only not hard for Ethan. He's so optimistic sometimes it drives me crazy. But, in reality it kept me from going crazy.
 I had my appointment with my midwife in the early afternoon, after working a shift at Baby Animal Days (so fun). Last Thursday, we found that baby's head was engaged and I was dilated to a 4 (4 cm). So I rested over the weekend, but got busy Monday and Tuesday to get ready!
Tuesday's check was to see if there had been any progress. Not much, she just wanted to make sure that my water hadn't broken (a slow leak actually) and sent me to a family practitioner in town. A very, very good man, highly recommended, especially for natural birthing. Well, he did a few other checks and wasn't sure either, so he sent me to Labor & Delivery for a "Labor Evaluation".
Whaa?
When E got off work, we met up and I finally realized that this could be it. I knew my body wasn't ready (does a woman's own intuition count in medical/hormonal situations such as these?), but I was about to be 'put into the system'. Everything I didn't want and hadn't prepared for.  I was grateful for my 2 care providers working together to help me, I was just angry at the situation and my own un-preparedness for it.
Well, we got checked in and immediately hooked up to the monitors. Ugh. I now have personal experience and thus a personal hatred for the things. Laying reclined put serious pressure on my back that I've been working to avoid the last 6 months. Plus it cause me personal anxiety over my and my baby's condition. Not to mention the frenzied and brisk nurses...

But the Lord was watching over us. We were put in a room with huge windows looking out over the East mountains of North Logan. That was the view I had growing up, and most of my life since, and that helped me feel much more comfortable. About an hour later, the Elder's Quorum from our ward came to visit patients so we called them in and had a quick chat, them assisting E in giving me a Priesthood blessing. So nice to see someone we knew. The last tender mercy was our kind nurse. We met a few others and were v-e-r-y glad to have her. She was tentative and open, and asked my  permission before doing anything. The general tone in L&D was wary as they found out we we 'a home birth' (How does that describe us??). So I appreciated her demeanor so much.

Birth balls are awesome!

What we learned from this experience:

• Take a book/movie. We were there for 4 hours. The actual work done could have been done in under as hour.
• Move around as much as you can/desire. There is no reason you need to lay in the bed unless you want to, you are being checked, or you're on the monitor. That last one is even negotiable.
• Have a 'birth plan'. This does not need to be complicated. Even just 3 things you want and 3 things you don't. They ask you about it as you're getting settled so you can be on the same page from the very beginning.
• The rooms were not so bad, nor the husband snack parlor. Doesn't mean I could handle a birth there. Yes, honestly. People think we're brave for doing a home birth. The hospital scares us more.

On a brighter note, we had a quick ultrasound to check some things and saw a cute little face and a head of fine hair! The tech gave us the estimated weight at 6lbs, 15 oz., but still no gender. Everything turned out to be fine, and we got to come home. E was a great support and we are (ultimately) grateful for this 'practice run' for birthing.
Song #1 "Held" on the playlist will be the theme for today's post. Afterall, how can Christ be our 'Savior' if we never need 'saving'?